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Comment: Surprise, surprise. Someone started one of those "You
know you've been playing Tibia too long when" threads. I couldn't
resist contributing. |
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| Too Long Tibia - part 1 | ||
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You think all out war is an appropriate response to the theft of a fishing rod. You set some poor bastard on fire because he was blocking the post office entrance. You hack a dog to pieces as Main Street pedestrians look on in horror. "Don't worry. He'll respawn." You show up at conferences wearing an incorrect name tag and tell everyone where they can shove it. You flip off the cops and repeatedly tell them "to do their frikkin' jobs." When chatting, you immediately blurt out your entire side of the conversation, and then walk away while your friend responds to everything you've said. When folks politely object to you acting like a complete jerk, you unbelievably threaten that your 600 friends, all experts in Kung Fu Lish Ness, will be paying them a visit. You have the bruises (and hopefully, the deep, deep psychological trauma) to prove you have actually tried saying "plz plz plz plz plz plz" to someone. You fill empty coke bottles with anti-freeze and con elementary school kids into downing it. "Oh, scratch your knee on the playground? This will make you feel better." No matter how hard you try, you cannot manage to climb on the frikking table. You're sent home from school for mooning your math teacher, marmalizing three classmates, and following the school nurse around for an hour saying <hump>. The next day you return to school claiming you were hacked. Some old man keels over dead in the supermarket, and you run up to grab his wallet and car keys. On Sundays, you push folks out of church and kick their ass. You have contracted trichinosis-- perhaps from one of the hulking slabs of raw pig you eat every fifteen minutes. You call the police emergency number, hoping that they can do something about that stupid capital Z at the end of your name. You act like a chick in the hopes that people will give you rilly cool stuff. You often refer to God as a "money-hungry screwhead who never listens." -Khwaj |
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